Update: I wrote this Sunday and now it is Monday eve. And had a good run today. Smoke-free- the first day. Did not get a chance to post until now. ...
Today is the day (though I am writing this the afternoon before). I want to be prepared for everything. Even posting this lovely enduring sentiment to my cigarette brand on my inspiration board. All reminders are good reminders.
I have smoked on and off (more on) since I was 17 years old. Now I am 34. I'll leave the math to you, but it is long over due. Now that my own Mother is going through chemo and the treatments have been good to her. In honor of her and of course my own health. I am quitting. I rarely speak of my smoking (except when I did this below lay-out last year).
I don't like to talk about it, because honestly I am ashamed. It doesn't represent cool anymore to me. So, it is time. And this is where I need your help friends. I need accountability and that is why I am broadcasting via blog airwaves. I need you to keep me going, tell me stories of success or reminders of what is the consequences. Even if you don't smoke, as most of my friends don't now a days. I am sure there something you might be able to use to relate. I don't know, but I need support. And open dialog. I have always been a believer in keeping quiet plans, like weight loss attempts. I am just worried by talking about it, it sets you up for failure. But, I have come to realize that mentality does no good. If you shed light on things, it seems to loosen it's grip. I have learned to look at my smoking not as a weakness, but a excuse. Excuse to not better myself. Excuse to distract me from really matters. It all started as a teenage experimentation that now has turned into addiction. But, addictions can be overcome. And I don't want to shorten this precious life, I want to honor it with taking care of the body God gave me. life and health is such a gift and I have learned this the hard way in the last year. And I don't want these lessons to go unnoticed.
There is a quote that Ali E. featured on her blog last week that spoke to me at the core of my being ( I know dramatic wordage, but it did:)
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
With your one wild and precious life?
With your one wild and precious life?
-mary oliver.
I want to be authentic me. BE living in my potential. Openly challenge my fears. Not let the mistakes of the past define the present. Be kind and firm with myself. Be prepared and live in action...
so I have things prepped for today's (really tomorrow) quit day.
1. the nicotine patch. It has worked well for me in the past.
2. a clean house. that does wonders everyday.
3. My yoga mat and dvd ready for the morning.
4. Orbit Cinnamon gum.
5. fake cigarettes to hold if need be. I know it sounds weird, but it works to pretend sometimes.
6. Green tea. To calm and get that metabolic rate a kick.
7. Books. Books. Books. & walks. walks. walks.
8. Making my bedroom as comfortable as possible. So, I have a place to chill, when the cravings may hit.
9. Stay busy and switch my routine up.
10. Last, but not least a little reward at the end of the week. A pedicure may be in order.
Thank you. Have a wonderful Monday:)
